#IWasOffendedWhen Winners!
Great job, everybody! There was just too much funny to limit the winners to 10, so we chose 15 instead. Thanks for playing!
#IWasOffendedWhen you tried to hand me a greeting card with glitter on it. Nice try asshole. #IWasOffendedWhen when you told me the carnival ride had a weight limit. #IWasOffendedWhen the waiter brought me diet soda "by accident." #IWasOffendedWhen I told my Dad I had a girlfriend and he said "Stalking doesn't count, son." #IWasOffendedWhen auto correct continuously corrected my profanities during a rant, which unleashed another torrent of corrected curses #IWasOffendedWhen you asked me how I managed to get such an attractive date to come with me to the company Christmas party. #IWasOffendedWhen asked to leave that chuck'e'cheese because I "look creepy" and "don't have kids" and "aren't wearing pants" damn fascists #IWasOffendedWhen you implied I wasn't good enough for you, but then you date a dude who wears bedazzled jeans.
#enjoyHPV #IWasOffendedWhen you tried to throw me out of your car after I said Weird Al's "Tacky" was better than Pharrell's "Happy." #IWasOffendedWhen that number you gave me at the bar was for a bipolar disorder help line. #IWasOffendedWhen Congress gave the banks $850 BILLION dollars in bailouts for being reckless but I'm still on the hook for my student loans #Iwasoffendedwhen I bought your Tupperware then you didn't buy my Pampered Chef! That's not how it works! #IWasOffendedWhen Fox cancelled Firefly. Those sons of bitches.. #BrownCoat #Serenity #IWasOffendedWhen you thought I stole your tweet. Dude- we are both smart, hilarious people-bound to happen that we write the same thing.
Here are some from the Bees
#IWasOffendedWhen you said that I was the first girlfriend you ever had that weighed more than you...in front of my grandmother. #truestory #IWasOffendedWhen you commented on my tweet, but didn't favorite it.